Smackdown opening

Our hosts are Michael Cole and Tazz and we're somewhere in Tecas.

Rey Mysterio and Hardcore Holly vs. JBL and Ken Kennedy
JBL cuts a long promo before the match. Heels control Rey to start. Hardcore gets the tag and chops JBL. Rey comes back in but gets booted down by. Tag to Kennedy and he almost gets 619ed by JBL stops it and beats Rey down with the Mexican Flag behind the ref’s back. Back in it gets 2 for KK. JBL gets a fall away slam on Rey for 2. JBL goes to the bear hug. Rey gets out but gets shoulder blocked back down and KK comes in. Rube Goldberg bulldog by Rey and Holly gets the hot tag. He cleans house, and gets the dropkick on JBL. He goes for the Alabama Slam, but KK helps prevent it. Nut shot on JBL, but KK distracts Holly and JBL gets the Clothesline for Hell for the pin. Solid tag match. **½

Highlights from last week’s main event

Backstage, Batista steals Eddie’s food.

Somewhere at some point Christy comes in on a motorcycle and gets into it with Melina.

Melina with MNM vs. Christy Hemme
Melina dropkick gets 2, and she goes to the armbar. She armsnaps Christy on the ropes. Forearm gets 2. Christy gets a rollup for 2. Hairtoss gets the same. Pin with bridge also gets 2 for Christy. Mercury distracts the ref and Nitro trips up Christy, which gets the pin for Melina. MNM go to Snapshot Christy after the match but LOD 2005 saves. Match was surprisingly watchable. *½

Undertaker vs. Cowboy Bob Orton
Cole claims he’s never seen a handicap casket match in his LIFE, which is ridiculous considering he called the first and only other handicap casket match on Smackdown in 1999 of Viscera and Mideon vs. Triple H. Bob pounds on Taker to start but that doesn’t last long at all. Ref gets bumped and Randy comes out. They beat down Taker to no heat. Sledge off the top gets 2 for Bob. Taker fights them both off, blocking an RKO, and gets the Tombstone for the pin. Boring heatless mess. DUD.

No Mercy card rundown

Bobby Lashley vs. Russell Simpson
Lashely powers Simpson around the ring but misses a charge and Simpson works his leg. There’s some weird old guy as referee here. Lashley fights back getting a backbreaker and some clotheslines followed by the Dominator for the pin. Simon comes out on his GOB scooter and announces he’s facing Lashley at No Mercy, and offers him a drink, but Lashley crushes the can with his foot and press slams Simon over the top rope. Impressive. ½*

Peep Show time. Christian feels he should be #1 contender for the US Title. Booker T and Sharmell come out, and they feel Booker should be #1 contender. Orlando Jordan comes out and he feels he should be #1 contender. GM Teddy comes out and says it’s up to Benoit, but decides to make a Triple Threat match now for the hell of it,

Christian vs. Orlando Jordan vs. Booker T
We join the match in progress. Booker high kicks and suplexes Orlando. They all go to the outside where OJ gets whipped into the steps. Christian goes to the chinlock on Booker back in the ring. Booker catches Christian going up and superplexes Christian while Orlando powerbombs him. Nice spot. Orlando gets a 2 count on both guys. Booker side kick on OJ and he spinaroonies. Rollup on Christian gets 2. Scissors kick is blocked, and so is the Unprettier. Orlando school boys Booker while a slingshots Christian over the ropes for the pin. Benoit comes out afterwards and after much deliberation decides for a Fatal Fourway at No Mercy. Match was just filler. *

Backstage, Vince meets with Teddy and Cannon. Teddy announces JBL, Rey, Benoit, Christian, Eddie, and Batista for the Homecoming in a surprise match. Hmm…

LOD 2005 vs. Eddie Guerrero and Batista for the WWE Tag Team Titles
We join the match in progress with Heidenreich beating on Eddie and both guys tagging out. Batista and Animal lockup and have a strength stalemate. Eddie tags himself in and Heidenreich comes in also and he peppers Eddie with rights. Eddie lowblows Heidenreich in clear sight but somehow the ref misses it. Hawk comes in and slams Eddie for 2. Double back elbow gets 2 for the champs. Heidenreich sidewalk slam gets 2. Doomsday Device is reversed into a hurrincanrana by Eddie that crotches Heidenreich in the process. Batista gets the hot tag and cleans house. He Batistabombs Heidenreich but Hawk saves. MNM run in and hit Hawk with a chair for the DQ. Batista goes to power bomb Nitro while Eddie swings a chair at Mercury, but Mercury ducks and Eddie hits Batista in the back by mistake. Eddie throws the chair to Mercury and plays dead, and Mercury is who Batista finds holding the chair and he pays for it with a chair to the back. Eddie and Batista are still Best Friends Forever. Match was doing alright before the crap ending. *½

Overall Thoughts: Uneventful Smackdown that continues to have the Batista/Eddie fued as it sole highspot. Look out WWE, TNA is coming.