RAW Report 7/18/05
  • 07/19/2005 (12:36:31 am)
  • Jimmy

Jimmy Reviews Raw for 7/18/05

We go right to Eric Bischoff coming out. Lillian announces a match for the IC Title. Bischoff shows the video of him getting FU'ed, and announces that Cena will face Snitsky in a Lumberjack Match tonight.

RAW Opening.

Our hosts are Jim Ross, Jonathan Coachman, and Jerry Lawler, and we are live from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Carlito (Carribean Cool) vs. Shelton Benjamin for the Intercontinental Title in a match where Count-Outs result in a title change
Shelton dominates to start, getting the blinger splash. Carlito bails, and Shelty almost screws up the flying crossbody again. Flying clothesline gets 2 for Shelton. Carlito takes over, and gets a roll-up with his feet on the rope for 2. DDT gets 2 for Carlito. Jumping flatliner gets 2 also. Inside cradle gets 2 for Shelton. Carlito gets desperate, and low blows Shelton for the DQ. Just like I said, the Honky Tonk Man route. *

Kurt Angle comes out for another Kurt Angle Invational. He cuts a promo. His challanger is Matt Striker, who of course Kurt recognizes. Striker gets a rear naked choke and holds that on for a while, until Kurt gets out. Angle Slam and Ankle Lock finish with 24 seconds left. Poor Striker.

RAW Diva Search. They talk about who they'd vote off. Crowd chants boring. Simona gets voted off. Whatever.

Backstage Eric Bischoff and his dopleganger Kerwin White discuss gold. Jericho comes in and says he and Cena will have a battle of the bands next week.

Todd Grisham interviews Shawn Michaels, who talks about Hogan and such

Chris Masters has his MasterLock challange. He ups the prize to $20,000. Rosey accepts, and of course loses. Masters gets on the mic, and says the work 'big' one too many times, and of course Big Show comes out. Masters runs.

Todd Grisham interviews Edge, who hates us internet fans. Then he'd hate me pointing out he has chicken legs.

Hulk Hogan joins us and immediately plugs his show. He challanges Shawn to come out, and he does. Michaels yammers on about something, until Hogan finally accepts a match for SummerSlam. Can we please get some wrestling on this show?

Backstage, Jericho motivates the heel lumberjacks.

Kane vs. Edge in a Steel Cage
Before Edge can even get in, Matt Hardy attacks, and is again dragged off and arrested. Standard cage stuff to start. Edge controls the tempo, busting Kane open. Kane fights back, getting the flying clothesline. Edge gets a missle dropkick. Edge climbs, but gets caught. Kane goes for the chokeslam, but Edge lowblows him. Edge goes back up, but gets powerbombed back down for 2. Spear gets 2 for Edge. Edge goes for the briefcase, and they both climb up and Edge knocks him with it and escapes. Eh. *1/2

The Philadelphia Eagles are here. Too bad they got owned by my Patriots last February. Count it.

Smackdown Rebound of Batista vs. Jordan, again.

Maria interviews Cena, and thinks that the match really involves lumberjacks. WE GET IT, SHE'S DUMB.

Snitsky vs. John Cena in a Lumberjack match
All the lumberjacks are heels, and Doug Basham still has his Secretary of Defense tights, the poor dope. Thos amatch could not have been more boring. Lots of things go on with the lumberjacks. Snitsky goes to the chinlock. Cena fights back and goes for the FU, but Kurt clips him behind the ref's back. Big boot gets 2 for Gene, as the faces (including VAL!) suddenly rush down to even the score. Vis humps the Heart Throbs. Cena finishes Snitsky with the FU after Jericho tries to get involved. DUD

Overall Thoughts: All talk and no play makes Jimmy a dull boy.  Smackdown better make up for this.

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